uMessage

Remember when you said that you can never see all of the times you've been cute to me? Well that's now a lie because here I've saved some of them. Hehe I'm right :D And I actually captured them in the best medium possible: your spectacular voice. Although they don't all capture the epitomy of your cuteness (you're mostly just getting out of work), every word you speak is a soundwave of pure gold and I treasure it all. I also lost all form of timestamps or chronological order while encoding the audio files, so they're gonna be from all different times, just a heads up. (And although the bottom isnt technically a voicemail, it follows the same theme and I love it so I put it there anyways)

Voicemails

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      So I hope you're ready for this one cuz I have a lot of thoughts and feelings rn and I wanna get them all out. So first I decided I wAs gonna type you up a nice long message after I watched a movie once I got home from my grandparents house. It was a shitty movie, like horrible acting and definitely low budget and I literally don't even know what it's called. But the premise was a woman who had been hit by a car and was bed ridden to heal but had no good friends or relatives able to care for her. So she ends up calling her ex boyfriend and asking him to take care of her. Which seems weird and is, especially cuz he has a girlfriend, but you find out that the woman who got hit by the car had taken care of her ex boyfriend for two years while he battled colon cancer and when he was cured he broke up with her. So it's this cute shit where he agrees and they fall in love again and it was so predictable. But at the same time, it made me think of you. Not because we have been through these horrific things (thank god) but because when I think of you I know that all I wanna do is take care of you. I never want you to feel an ounce of pain and I would do absolutely anything to put a smile on your face and make anything and everything in your life better and easier and I know you'd do the same for me. And I think that's pretty damn cool. Then I finished math and was looking at some quotes, and I found two that I like. The first relates somewhat to college I thought, and it is, "If ever there is a tomorrow when we are not together, there is something you must ALWAYS remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is even if we are as part, I'll ALWAYS be with you." -Winnie the pooh. This is important for two reasons. One is the part about you being braver and stronger and smarter. This is so true to you and everyone, but I need to make sure you never forget it. No matter where life takes us and you, don't ever let anyone convince you that you are less than you are. You are the most amazing man I have ever met (yes I just said man) and there is not a single thing about you that you need to change. And secondly, no matter where we go, whether we are together but live miles and miles apart, or if we sadly find a day when we no longer can be together, I will always be with you and you will always be with me. That's the crazy thing about the kind of love we share. It stays with you for life. I'll forever carry with me all of the crazy adventures and experiences we have shared, and all of the memories we have yet to make. And lastly, I found this quote, and I had to share it. "Have you ever just looked at someone and thought, 'I really love you.' They're just talking or humming or watching a movie or reading a book or laughing or someone, and there's something about them in that moment that makes you think, 'wow, I just really love you.'" When I read this I swear I just saw so many of our memories flash before my eyes. I saw myself lying on the floor of your basement with you on November 29th and thinking that exact thing "wow I love you" and then getting to actually say that like 10 minutes later. I saw myself in the car with you, driving to soccer games and restaurants, and looking over at yu with your sunglasses on, belting out a tune. Once again, it was "wow I love him". I saw myself laying on the couch in your basement, and the couch in my basement, and your bed. I saw myself lying there with you, all cuddled up, stroking the hair on the back of your neck and seeing you smile down at me. JESUS, I cannot explain how much I love you in those moments. I saw myself in the bad moments too. In the day you picked me up from the hospital, and I started crying and you tried to comfort me and I told you to just drive. Sure, I might Not have loved you yet, but I will never forget that moment. Your face was straight, yet I could just see the worry in it. You wanted to help but weren't sure how. I saw myself in the car outside your house in complete tears, screaming at you. And then you grabbed my hand, and kissed it, telling me you loved me and you were sorry and you were gonna fix it. I guess it boils down to the fact that I see myself in all of these moments and more because everything you say and do makes me fall more in love with you everyday. It doesn't take some profound act or moment to make me think and realize that I love you. It's the little things that happen that leave me in awe of you and us. I am over the moon for you Rigel Madraswalla. I am in the type of love with you that you don't ever fully recover from. You are forever imprinted in my heart and soul. I love you for who you were, for who you are, and who you're soon to become. I love you with no hesitation, with no motive, with no particular reason. I love you simply because I love every inch of your being, and because every piece of you seems to fit so perfectly with every piece of me. I love you to the moon, and to infinity and beyond my boyfriend , my buzz lightyear, my bubbs, my best friend, and my better half. Never forget that